Monday, January 24, 2011

Kids, Instruction Manual NOT included...

I would just like to ask how in the heck one is supposed to know how to raise a kid. If the world was fair and just, I would have delivered a baby, then the user's manual, then the placenta. BUUT no. God has a sense of humor apparently and I'm sure he laughs up there as he watches Mace and I scramble around trying to raise a child.

Experts have a lot to say about a lot of different things.. don't spank, don't do time out, don't say "no" too much, don't give them fast food, don't blah blah blah. Friends, family members, and random people I have no idea who they are, have their opinions on raising kids too. I'm just worried that by the time we get this whole raising kids thing down, ours are going to be so screwed up that there's no turning back! They will be obese because we feed them fast food and fruit juice instead of vegetables and filtered water; they will be entitled and have no respect for boundaries because I didn't make them take a bath before bed because I just couldn't handle the screaming; they will not know how to be considerate and loving because I didn't make them share their special toy with a friend at our house....

Juice, not water... My soon to be obese child.

Eamonn Keeping himself entertained at the grocery store... I'm sure everyone was thinking, "what kind of mom just lets her kid run around the store with a grocery cart like that!?" lol

What are you supposed to do when your one year old tells you "no" all the time?! I mean, he's just a kid and I figure he's just looking for a reaction, but then others say that is not acceptable and they need to know that you are the one in charge. Great. I'm going to raise a kid that has no respect for authority.

Ex: I have pulled that boy away from the garbage can thousands of times! I am sick of finding sippy cups and random household objects in there but I swear I have tried everything but beating his little bum to keep him away! "No" does not work, it only encourages him. Time outs are not showing great results, and just picking him up and moving him does not stop him from dumping his shoes into there! As I said. I am screwing my kid up. What about when he chucks his food across the house when he is done eating? Do I say, "NO NO!"? (This seriously only makes him do it more... he get's this look of sheer evil in his eyes that says, "oh yah old woman?! watch this.."  Do I say, "ok, all done with lunch!" and take his tray? (This seems to work best, but then I get comments from other people about how my kid is going to be spoiled rotten and will probably end up going to prison for assassinating the president of the United States or something horrendous like that..) Do i never feed the little terror again!? I just don't know.

Eamonn running around naked and destroying our DVD cabinet....

I know I am not going to spank, that's just not my thing, so I guess we're making progress right? Atleast I know what we are not going to do...

What about when he gets older and starts getting smarter and dare I say it? even naughtier!?

What about when the world is teaching him one thing about sex and Mace and I will need to teach what is the truth about it? Will I teach him the right way!? Will he respect women and see them as daughters of God rather than objects of lust? What will I need to do or say when he wants to date a girl? What about kissing girls?

Kids are just so difficult. What the heck were we thinking when we decided to bring another one into this world? I just feel bad for them more than I do for me because they are the ones who are going to have to deal with the repercussions of crazy, clueless parents.

Naked yet again (mom of the year award right here..) and playing on the laptop which we are CONSTANTLY trying to keep him away from... lol
Caught in the act of getting into Mommy's camera!

Hopefully they'll see that we tried our best. Hopefully Heavenly father won't allow us to screw them up too much. I know that we need to turn to the Lord for guidance in all things but sometimes I wonder if he cares about such trivial matters as discipline of a one year old? As I write I hear a whisper that yes, indeed he does. He will teach me how to teach each child the way that He knows they will do best. They are actually His children and they are just on loan to me.

That's pretty trusting of Heavenly Father if you ask me. He's letting these adorable little spirits come into our care so we can learn to love and be more like Him. That's a lot of trust and responsibility.

I guess it's just tough. Seeing the way your friends raise their kids, reading different books and magazines, hearing how your parents did it when you were a kid; one just never knows what is the right way. Is there even a right way?

As I write I am realizing that more than anything, I need not judge others and the way they have chosen to raise their kids. Who am I to say that their kids are too whiny or that they don't discipline enough, or they discipline too much? I'm pretty sure we are all in the same boat here. We all are kind of stumbling through the unknown territories of parenthood and all deserve some credit for actually attempting the seemingly impossible.

Promoting childhood obesity at Halloween. Eamonn LOVES candy. Can't blame him, so do I!

I used to see kids with muddy, grimy faces and boogery noses and think, "where is their mother? obviously she is extremely negligent and uncaring." or I would hear a kid crying in walmart and think, "would you do us ALL a favor and take that demon child of yours home?"
Now I know what it is like. I have been slapped in the face with the "reality of parenthood" stick and all I can say is, ouch. lol

I have been the mom who has been so tired from working, from cleaning, from juggling life, that giving my kid a bath hasn't been on top of the priority list for 3 days... I now can say that I have been the mom who doesn't even bother at times cleaning that nasty, crusty booger nose because I have done it fourty thousand times already today and my poor baby's nose is raw and bleeding from the constant tissue attacks from mommy caring too much about what other people are thinking. I have been the mom who just has to run into Walmart to grab a few last minute things for dinner, who's baby screams the ENTIRE time, up and down the aisles and throughout the 20 minute wait at the check out stand.

Getting into Birthday cupcakes just a little too early... 

All we could do was laugh and let him enjoy himself.

From now on, when I see a kid yelling "No!" to his mommy, or a mommy getting so upset at her kids in the middle of the grocery store that she just yells at them in frustration, instead of thinking, "oh my gosh. seriously? what kind of parent are they?" I am going to think... "poor woman. she deserves a bubble bath and a bag of snickers for her troubles."

White Trash parent who takes her kids places with just a diaper. Classy.

Here's a deal for all those who are reading this. I won't judge you if you don't judge me. ;) and if you are reading this and don't have kids of your own, give your own mother a hug and thank her for doing her best in raising you. I know I will and do every chance I can.

Again, eating sugar, with no clothes on. Will my child think that clothes are not necessary? My grandma always said that our kids were going to go on their first dates and take of their clothes because that's how they'd always done it... haha

Moral of the story, Kids are freaking hard to raise, don't judge the other moms out there who are trying their best, and The Lord will make sure you don't screw your kids up TOO much.

Letting Eamonn make a mess all over the place with a cookie, right before going into the grocery store, Again, Classy mom right here.


  1. I won't judge you I promise. I'm promoting obesity as well...its so much easier to say"you're hungry again!? Wellllll then you get to eat cookie crisp off the floor because I don't have energy to fix you another full course meal to have it end up on thE floor..." I think it's hilarious when kaleb does bad things because he gets this mischievous look on his face and does an evil laugh...bad mommy.haha. If I ever run into you in the grocery store and eamonn is freaking out,I'll convince kaleb to scream too so you don't feel like a lone poor mom who need a bubble bath. :)

  2. Lauren, it sounds to me like your child is perfectly normal - which says that you're doing a good job as a mommy. Don't worry too much about what the experts say. None of them can agree, anyway. Just do what you feel is right for your child and pray for the inspiration you need. Then, with the help of the Spirit, you can pick and choose which "experts" to believe.

    If you don't mind, I'll give you one observation from my experience so far - most discipline methods don't work till they're at least 2, so I usually just do my best to keep things out of reach or just do damage control till then. It's frustrating, but sometimes it's all you can do (Sam's nickname right now is Peanut the Destroyer). Hang in there. Like I said, it sounds to me like you're doing a great job!

  3. In school we learn about all the 18 bajillioin theories people have about behavior and kids - and that's just to keep them from killing each other at school. ha. Ya just have to take it on a kid by kid basis, see what works with Eammon, and as usual - he's not half as bad as you think- you're just being hard on yourself. Eammon's a peach, i love his litte stink butt.

  4. Good one Laur. You should watch the show Parethood. It's on tuesday nights on the same channel as biggest looser (infact it's right after it). You'll love it! It's my favorite! And since you are at home on bedrest right now's the perfect time. It's currently in the 2nd season so you should just catch up today and then start tomorrow! :) Man...I feel like Autumn is the easiest child in the world ...of course she doesn't talk yet. Hopefully I just have clones of her for the rest of my kids. haha

  5. This is AWESOME Laur. I love this. I love you. I love Eamonn and I've never met him. Heavenly Father wouldn't have given you such an active kid if he didn't think you could handle it. You're amazing. Eamonn sounds like he is going to be so smart, cause he is so adventurous. That's awesome. He can be obese and smart. :) Reading this is good birth control for me. I would be a nut case. Mentally, I already am sometimes. I swear I'm Bipolar and have Depression. I just am too scared to admit that to people. :p You're my hero lauren. You seriously are. I miss you and love this blog. Keep updating. I check it daily. Loves.

  6. I loved this Lauren..Especially this part

    "They are actually His children and they are just on loan to me."

    That gave me shivers down my spine. Then this part

    "That's pretty trusting of Heavenly Father if you ask me. He's letting these adorable little spirits come into our care so we can learn to love and be more like Him. That's a lot of trust and responsibility."

    I loved everything you had to say...pretty much you just summed up all new mothers feelings. It took me awhile to find out for myself that there is not right and wrong way...It's what you feel is the best way possible to keep your child happy and that little heart beating.

    Love you Lauren and I know Heavenly Father trusts all women to be mothers. Especially you. :)

  7. oh its all so true Laur... I love you and even before you made babies I knew you were going to be an awesome mommy! I cant wait to come visit your crazy house one day...

  8. I think you're awesome. ;) Keith and Eamonn can be obese together. I swear, all Keith will eat now is candy. I've come to the conclusion that its better for him to eat SOMETHING (even if its candy), than it is for him to starve. I keep offering him normal food, but if he refuses to eat it I'm not going to shove it down his throat. If all he wants is Candy Canes and Cinnamon Santa's, than I guess that's what he'll get for now. Eventually, I'm sure/hope that he will learn to enjoy other, healthier foods. Plus they are so active at this age that they burn it off in no time. I never know what I'm doing from day to day, but my kids are still alive, they're dressed most of the time, and they are happy. I don't think anything else matters. :)

  9. Well personally I think you're doing just fine. If you're interested you should check out the book parenting with love and logic. Love ya girl! Hope things are going ok with your pregnancy! Let me know if you need any help or anything!

  10. Oh, Lauren! You make me laugh! You're doing a great job as a mom. You have the basics down just fine. And, just think, you'll get this stage down and he'll be moving on to the next one you don't know how to handle. You'll do great as a mom just because you've got a solid foundation of love in your home for each other and for the Savior.

  11. it's a deal. don't judge me, i won't judge you. Parenting is reeeeeeally hard, especially when you're pregnant. we'll all try our hardest. No matter what we're going to screw up our children in some way or another, I'm sure, but as long as we love them and keep in mind a lot the thoughts you put in this post, none of it will be too major, I'm sure.

  12. This was awesome to read Lauren. I'm scared every day to have kids for this very reason. Not that they'll screw me up but that I'll screw them up. It sounds like you know what matters though. There's too many moms out there who think they and their kids need to be perect. When really it only matters what Heavenly Father thinks of you.